My son's appropriate reaction. This should be everyone's natural response to their first outing at the soup, salad, and breadstick churning machine known as the Olive Garden. A mixture of attraction, horror, and dumbfounded awe. How am I supposed to explain to my son why daddy has just ravenously devoured seventeen buttery salted carb sticks chased by eight bowls of gnocchi soup. How do I expect him to grasp the concept of the entree when I'm too full to eat mine when it arrives? What lesson is to be learned from watching dad try to distract mom in order to steal her Andies mint? And shouldn't half of these customers be wandering the aisles of Walmart? Confusion and gripping terror.
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