Play Ball!

Yes! It's opening day for the good ol' MLB! Time to solidify the family unit by enjoying our nation's favorite pastime together. We did, however, forget to tell Xavier that we're not actually going to be playing baseball. This lack of foresight resulted in a much wasted stretch routine...



Calf stretch



Ankle stretch



Quads and hammys



Groin



Feel that streeeetch...



It's that good kinda hurt.

Sometimes I can't help but wonder what's going on inside his tiny little noggin. Paranoia isn't my cup of tea, and while he seems full of love and contentment, I can't help but wonder why our son spends so much of his time stretching his legs. His calves and hammys can't possibly be any more relaxed. It's as if he's planning the run of a lifetime. Why all the training? What's he planning? Does he secretly resent the outfits with baseballs and animal faces on the butts? Is he gonna make a break for daylight? Where's he going to go? Will dairy farmers be able to meet production demands when Xavier's face on milk cartons drives sales through the roof?

The Bigger They Are...

"I'm fixin' to try something new today. Don't know if this will work. In theory it seems pretty simple. All eyes on the little guy."


"We're set to go on 3. 1... 2... 3."



"Perfect form on my approach. Good speed too. Not too fast, not too slow."



"Ground plant with the left, elevate with the right. Establish balance..."



"Focus. Shift balance to the right, elevate with the left, focus, reposition knees, balance..."



"Deep breath, extend legs... extend arms... I'm up! I'M UP!!!



"I'm down."

"Sic transit gloria. Glory fades. I'm Xavier Heffernan and my question for you is..."

"Do you still call them baby steps if you can't even stand?"

We're Mobile

Movement! Go X, go!



Ensuing celebration!

Lord of the Chicken Dance (Crossbones Style)

"Okay, so mom is going to teach me a new dance despite dad's protests. She says that it's pretty easy to learn. Should be pretty interesting considering my inability to crawl, let alone walk. Here we go."


Balance Xavier-san.


"You got me? Cuz if you don't I'm a goner. Good, now swing please."


"Not bad mom! Obviously this is not your first rodeo."


"Arms akimbo? This is a dance? Now I've seen everything."


"I don't want to be a chicken."


"I don't want to be a duck."


"SO I SHAKE MY BUTT! BABY BADONK!"


"And so concludes season 7 of So You Think You Can Dance."


"ZZZ... Wha... Musta passed out... I just had the weirdest dream..."

My son, the 1950's cabbie

Nice hat kid. If you lose your gig driving cabs I might be able to hook you up with a job as a 1940's shoeshine boy.






Heffernan household trivia: Which is older? X's fashion statement or that thermostat?



Lookin' sharp you two.



Sometimes when Xavier has a really great idea light shoots out of his ears. Or at least that's what I think is happening.